This afternoon Amy and I went to visit her inlaws for dinner. Her mother had prepared Pierogies for our meal. I made an arse out of me by assuming that they were fairly solid. I picked one up to bring it to my mouth only to have it break in half, halfway there. In a mad panic I try to minimise the damage and end up maximising it: knocking over my glass of wine which then proceeded to spill over my father-in-law’s hand, their dinner table and the serving plate piled high with pierogies.

They cleaned up the mess and poured me another glass of wine which did me little good because I had shrunk so small by that time that I could hardly see the top of the table anymore from my chair let alone reach my plate or my glass of wine.

After dinner we all got around the table and played a couple of rounds of Uno while Amy, her father and I polished off the remains of their bottles of Rumple Minz, Hot Damn and Goldschlager from their liquor cabinet.

I think I might pass out now.